Then to now... learning our baby has Down syndrome

Then to now... total acceptance.

Once my mind simmered I was able to pace myself again and step back into current reality instead of needing to race ahead.  My biggest job right now is to enjoy his pregnancy and I can do exactly that. :) 

I'm now 20 weeks, likely over half way since these babies tend to come a bit earlier.  In the last 5 weeks of finding out his diagnosis, the thing that sits with me the most is that he's a baby boy.  A baby boy with Down syndrome.  He's healthy.  He's mine.  His little life will have different challenges than my other kids, but I'm here for it.  I feel ready to learn and grow right along with this sweet boy.  

Now when I mention to someone that he has Down syndrome, it's as if I'm mentioning that we know he has blue eyes (which he probably won't, haha).  It's a part of him, simple as that.  

There are some realities that are different, however.  He's watched a bit more closely by Maternal Fetal Medicine in addition to my OB appointments.  Up head his schedule doesn't look too daunting.  

- 23 weeks: fetal echocardiogram with the pediatric cardiologist

- 24 weeks: OB appt

-26 weeks: MFM ultrasound

-28 weeks: OB appt

I think after that point it will get busy.  At my 20 week appointment, he got a clean bill of health.  This baby is growing great.  There are no major abnormalities.  The doctor seemed very impressed with little man.  I got the rundown of what is ahead, however.  Starting at 32 weeks I will be in the MFM office for a twice-weekly NST (Non Stress Test) and an ultrasound once a week.  The placenta has an extra copy of the 21st chromosome as well, so the placenta doesn't typically stay as hearty for as long.  Therefore there is a higher risk of stillbirth, so we watch carefully making sure that baby boy is still good in there. :) And if at any point he's not, we head for induction.  I'm guessing, knowing my body and babies that he will come closer to the 38/39 week mark, but we shall see.  

Meanwhile, I finally feel at peace with both his diagnosis and what is ahead in his pregnancy.  I love this little boy so much already and while I plan to enjoy his pregnancy, I also cannot wait to meet him face-to-face.