Dude. I don't know if you've noticed but childhood cancer is EVERYWHERE these days. It's beyond tragic. I keep hearing of children who are within a few months of June's age passing away from cancer. CANCER. A 3 or 4 year old. C-A-N-C-E-R
Are you kidding me?! How is that logical?
Who made cancer an acceptable thing for a toddler or preschooler to have? (and I'm not bashing God, I just need to get this out)
I mean... really?
::blinks::
I followed the story of this beautiful little girl over the last few months: http://www.greeleytribune.com/article/20110315/OBIT/703159944/1047 It was heart wrenching to read about her slowly losing function and the time ticking down. There were photos of her and those were even harder to see. I saw the post when she passed. I watched from the outside as her family said goodbye to their precious three year old daughter.
Who should ever have to go through that? You should never ever, under any circumstance have to bid a forever farewell to your baby. The back of my throat hurts and tears are just behind my eyes just imagining the pain her parents felt and the absolute peace that must have hovered just being with her... but knowing it wouldn't be much longer.
Darn it. There are the tears. It hurts to think about that being June. I can't fathom it.
And today... I had my 3 at the park and there was a little girl, about Josh's age, there with her brother and dad. Her hair was short... shorter than my boys, and I just hoped she'd somehow gotten a hold of clippers or something crazy like that. Then her brother (about June's age) confirmed my fear, "This is my sister Jessalyn. She's sick." MAN. My heart went out to that dad at the park. They had obviously went through chemo sometime recently. I don't know any more details, but it's just devastating. They too could easily lose their daughter.
A few months back I commented on how beautiful a little girl was that I did a card for. Her mother thanked me and said the photo was taken prior to chemo. She has leukemia and is now her "bald beauty."
Just 2 days ago I stumbled upon this post on FB: https://www.facebook.com/notes/sandi-woods-fussell/my-luke-422007-3152011/10150125345981250 A little boy exactly a month younger than June passed. Suddenly. If you read the comments there is an update that says his liver and sleen had oabnotmailies, likely from malignancies. He was fine one day, gone that night.
I could go on and on with instances. You just never know.
And this hits home for me because last Winter I really thought something bad was wrong with Josh. Before we tracked down the allergy I just knew he was sleeping a lot, fatigued easily, cried/whined most of his time awake, had "off" diapers, and wasn't gaining properly. Thank heavens it turned out to be this allergy but through the course of tracking down answers I'd be lying if I said I never thought about cancer. I pictured losing him.
I started this post to blow off steam, but now my heart is heavy. It is just a travesty that parents have to endure this. Who knows what lies in the future for any of us... it's just so sad that this is a seemingly common occurrence.
There is a reason for everything and those children are running and playing and rejoicing in Heaven... missing ever seeing the cruel side of the world. So there is that. And I guess beyond the pain leading to their passing, their families endure the most. They are in good hands once they leave here. But it doesn't make it a ton easier to bear.
Hug your kids extra tight tonight, people. When they ask you for something insane or bug you to read ANOTHER book... be happy that they have the ability to make silly requests and listen to unending stories. Some mothers would do anything to see their child run. To be asked to draw with chalk. To happily request a lollipop before breakfast. Some mothers don't have the luxury of cleaning dirt stains of their children's laundry or hearing a little voice request a fallen pacifier at 3am. There are so many things we take for granted and I know that I do a wonderful job of taking my kids for granted daily. I need to stop. They are blessings. Healthy, thriving blessings... full of spunk and life and little personaities eager to grow, learn, and play.
I'm blessed because my children are peacefully sleeping upstairs. The worst thing ahead of us is a GI scan for Josh and a teeth cleaning for June. I am going to treasure them because I can. They are here, they are mine, and I'm going to enjoy them. Every labor intensive, mommy-mommy-MOMMY moment of their little lives. <3
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