Faith

I was at church yesterday with June.  We went to St. Ann's alone because Josh thought it was a good idea to barf at 8:30am, squelching all plans for the day.  He was fine... no other incidences.  I should clue him in that there are easier ways to get out of church besides puke-age.

Anyway,  I actually (kinda) welcome church days like that because although I love the Latin Mass, I am a fan of St. Ann's.  I like the priests and when I go there I have less kids in tow, and there is more going on with music and more people so the kids are quiet and captivated.  They don't exactly... respect... the silence and reverent beauty of the Latin Mass yet and tend to run a muck. ;)  So I can actually soak in Mass at St. Ann's, whereas I'm corralling kids at St. Stephens for all of Mass.

So.... while I was at St. Ann's I was singing and there was a line that struck me.  It hit me so hard that I held the book open and studied the line even after the song was over because I wanted to burn it into my brain.

"Faith believes, nor questions how."

YEEEEEEES.  Yes. That is me.  That's how I roll.  Exactly.  Thank you hymn book. That line is my faith base in a nutshell.  It leaves me at a disadvantage when I have to defend my faith, but it's been my core for as long as I can remember.  I listen to well respected, intelligent, well versed, sound individuals about the faith... I listen objectively and I process, but I don't deeply question why and from where and how.  I keep an open eye and mind and am careful about where my sources come from, but my best quality is believing and living what is preached (or trying my hardest).

And trust me, when questioned, I look ill founded in my faith and pretty unintelligent (so if you read this, do me a favor and don't grill me bc I will fail, mmmm kay?) ;).  I have faith and I believe.   I don't doubt.  I don't waver. I don't ask how.  I know there were great saints who were great believers, I can't site who... though I'd love to, but they were good at believing and living the faith.  They were not so great at philosophy and probing for exact explanations and answers.  But I know they existed and they lived good lives based on what they believed and they got an awesome eternal reward because of it.  And hopefully that will be my final outcome too, but for now I'm enjoying the "see... that quote is me" moment.  I believe and I live.  Simple as that.